Long Talks

Well, Sunday night Troy and I decided to opt out of going to my sister & BIL's place to stay home and have some quality us-time, since we don't get much of it during the week. (He goes to school mornings and works 2nd shift - I work an 8-5) Wouldn't you know that when we decide to do that, we get into a fight. Actually, let me re-phrase that. We don't really fight, but we don't always see eye to eye on things that stem from our different backgrounds/the way we were raised. So Sunday night it was whether or not to watch TV. How stupid is that? But none-the-less, there we were, getting more than slightly frustrated with each other about it. See, he comes from a family that had it on almost all the time, while I, on the other hand, came from a family that hardly even watched the nightly news, let alone turned it on every time we were home. Well, we ended up leaving it off while we ate and then watching a little bit later, before we went to bed, so we compromised nicely, which we usually do in the end. But not before I ended up in tears over the fact that it seems like ever since we've gotten married we've struggled with this stupid argument. He brought up the good point that when he was on first shift and we were seeing so much more of each other than we are now, it wasn't really an issue, and he was right about that. But I was still disheartened about the whole issue. Then yesterday I was thinking a little bit more about the whole thing, and I realized how much better we've gotten at dealing with these little issues. When we were dating, we really never fought or disagreed about anything - and I'm not just saying that - we really didn't. So when we got married and started disagreeing about little things here and there, it was really hard to know how to deal with those issues that came up. We didn't ever have knock-down-drag-outs, but I felt frustrated a lot. Well, after Sunday night's little “discussion,” I realized how much better we've gotten about working through these things together. As soon as Troy realized that I was on the verge of tears, he took me in his arms and was really willing to fix this little problem of ours. It really made me thankful for a husband that is willing to talk through these things, instead of just ignoring them or not caring. So, although I hate the fact that we can't agree on everything, and I know we never will, I know now that we have figured out pretty well, with God's help, how to work through them... and I think that is absolutely essential to a good marriage. God knew exactly what I would need when he put Troy and I together, and I am so thankful for him - differences and all! But I am so much looking forward to the day when we'll be able to see each other for more than 2 hours a day. I think it really adds a lot of undue stress, especially when he's so busy all the time. A lot of people say we should be thankful for this time, and maybe it's not as bad as it seems, but these are also people that have never been in our shoes. I know some people do it their whole married lives, the opposite shift thing I mean, but I really don't think I was cut out for it. One more year till he's done with school, and I'm hoping and praying with everything in me that after that we will finally be able to get on the same schedule. It's just so hard!
Anyway - this has ended up being a whole lot longer than I meant it to be. Lots to say today, I guess.
I'll leave with a quote from “Life's Journeys with Mr. Rogers”...
“Relationships are like dances in which people try to find whatever happens to be the mutual rhythm in their lives.”

A little about us

So, I want to share a little about us. Troy and I have been married for over 2 years already (it goes so fast!), but have known each other a lot longer than that! Since we were 7 years old, we went to the same church, and ever since we laid eyes on each other, there was no one else for either one of us! We've had our times, of course, as I think every young relationship does, due to jealousy in high school, and other immature problems, but for all practical purposes, we have 'been together' almost our whole lives! We started 'dating' when we were sixteen, because my parents wouldn't let me date anyone exclusively/alone until then, but I know they always knew that Troy and I would be together no matter what. I remember my dad telling me how much he liked Troy back when we were like 12! He said, 'you should hang on to that one.' :o) So we dated all through the rest of high school, and my 2 years of college, and then in August of '03 we finally tied the knot! We were only 20 & 21, but we were so ready! I've gotten a lot of comments since then about how we're so young... but yunno, when you KNOW that you are meant to be together, what's the sense in delaying anything? So, here we are, 2 years later, still absolutely LOVING married life, and growing so much closer and stronger all the time! Isn't it amazing how you think you know each other so well when you are dating/first married, and then you just keep learning more about each other, and that makes you love them so much more!
As for where we are now, Troy's still in school - he is working on his Bachelor of Arts in Biblical Studies - hoping eventually to be the Senior Pastor of a church somewhere. I got a job as a Human Resources Assistant shortly after we got married to put him through the rest of school, but I can't say it's something I'll be doing the rest of my life for sure. We don't have any kids yet - in fact, we're sort of trying, but that's another day's blog...
That's about it for today. I need to get back to work. We don't have internet at home, so naughty me does all my interneting at work! :)